Tuesday, May 20, 2014

the word 'sorry'

Who invented the word 'sorry'?

saya mmg dh sangat muak sampai ke tahap meluat dengan perkataan 'sorry'. next time dengar lagi perkataan tu confirm muntah. ikutkan dictionary, perkataan sorry tu ada banyak definition. tapi penggunaan perkataan sorry orng skrng ni mcm x bermakna langsung

perkataan tu slalunya digunakan untuk mengelakkan rasa bersalah. kalau kita dh buat salah just cakap sorry je and then dh xkan rasa bersalah. xdlah rasa mcm menyesal buat kesalahan tu. next time boleh buat kesalahan yg sama balik n cakap balik perkataan sorry tu so everything will be ok again. is it?

Cuba baling batu kat cermin and then cakap sorry, tengok cermin tu cantum balik x?

x semua benda kt dunia ni boleh dibetulkan dengan sorry. sorry bukan that magical word untuk menutup, membetulkan and melupakan segala kesalahan dan kesilapan seseorang. bagi saya sorry tu bukan perkataan, ia perbuatan. sesuatu perbuatan yg menggambarkan penyesalan kadang2 sekali dengan usaha membetulkan kesilapan.

contohnya kita pinjam buku orng and then terkoyak. apa biasa kita buat? kita just pulangkan buku tu n kata sorry terkoyak. setiap kali orng tu pandang buku tu diorng xkan teringat sorry kita, diorng just igt yg kita koyakkan. ini contoh sorry yg x bermakna semata2 xnk rasa bersalah. ada orng akn try tampal balik, or seletip or betulkan benda koyak tu. itu mungkin menggambarkan poenyesalan. cara membetulkan kesilapan? belikan buku baru, buku yg sama. or maybe belikan buku lain yg orng tu nk sgt. maybe itu usaha membetulkan kesilapan.

memang kebanyakan mangsa akan kata "it's ok" "it's alright" "xplah" "xd papelah" and sebagainya. itu hanya menggambarkan their kindness. hanya sebab mereka baik n mungkin ada yg memaafkan, itu tidak bermakna kesalahan kita dh ditebus dengan perkataan 'sorry'

so ini contoh untuk barang2

how about trust? would you be able to fix it ever? think again...


Tuesday, May 13, 2014

last words...

Not soo long ago, saya nmpk status orng yg meyatakan salah sorng kenalan sy dh xd. tu salah satu berita yg sgt mengejutkan. sebab the last word that i told the person was not something nice. in fact, i hurt the person's feeling on purpose, so that the person will just shut it. at that time, i didn't have any regrets or feeling sorry or any guilt feeling for hurting the person. i just stopped for a while and start to think. i might feel that the person deserve to hear whatever i told but that should't be the last word ever. what am i going to do now? how should i apologize? i wasn't in any state of attending funeral. or should i just sit by the person's grave and regret?

then it turns out to be different person with same name. Well, the first hing i did was contact the person, just to really make sure that the person is alive. feel relieved. i didn't apologize but i said nice things before end the phone call. weird feelings...

in my daily life, i do leave a conversation in anger. and there are people i left feeling guilty for whatever they do. i even say things. do i really want to do that anymore? what if that was the last word i ever said to a person? would i be able to spend my life in regrets??? i'm not someone who forget things easily and i am already regretting things.

but would i be able to just swallow all kind of heart aches? just be silent and not expressing it? not making people realize what they did to me was wrong? would i be just keep thing at the deepest place in my heart? would it promise a happy or at least a better life when i'm not happy deep inside? will shedding tears in silence making thing ok?

would i?